The big rocks – The value of time

A week ago, in the Value of Time post, we discussed the big and small rocks, and I promised to dedicate a section to dive deeper into the big rocks’ aspect. Today we will explore together what the big rocks represent in our life, how to spot them, how to care for them, and how to hack our way into enjoying them regardless of their toughness.

Recall that I introduced Stephen Covey’s book “The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People” and stated that the book is a classic in self-improvement and personal development. We learned about a few key concepts, and one of the critical concepts that Covey introduced in his book is the idea of “Big Rocks,” which he used as a metaphor for the essential things in our lives.

Covey presented that “Big Rocks” is based on a simple analogy. Imagine that you have a jar and want to fill it with rocks, pebbles, and sand. If you fill the pot with sand first and then add the pebbles and rocks, you won’t be able to fit everything else in the jar. But if you put the big rocks in first and then add the pebbles and sand, everything will work flawlessly without you breaking a sweat. There is also a YouTube video on the big rocks idea that you can watch for fun.

Covey uses this analogy to explain that we need to focus on the most esential things in our lives first and then fit everything else around them. In other words, we must prioritize the “big rocks” in our lives.

So, what are these “big rocks” that Covey is talking about? According to him, they can be divided into four major categories.

He speaks about personal integrity, including honesty, responsibility, and personal values. Covey argues that without personal integrity, we won’t be able to achieve anything meaningful in our lives.

However, if you are like me or most human beings, you know that this is easier said than done. When was the last time you could easily refuse a good amount of money because you thought your integrity was on the line? I’m sure you thought to take the money and care about your integrity later. Taking responsibility or sticking to one’s value when something of great value is on the scale is challenging. Honesty is another difficult one. It takes most people extra strength to remain honest. Even as a child, when we broke a toy and were asked about it, we were quick to lie because we feared punishment. Nevertheless, if we stick to these values and unique characteristics, over time, we earn more respect. We earn people’s trust and appreciation. And trust and respect are things that can take one farther than money could ever take us.

Take personal health, which includes physical, mental, and emotional health. Covey stresses that we need to take care of ourselves to be effective in other areas of our lives.

I’m sure that health is one of your nightmares if you are like most of us. Physical or mental health is so easy to neglect these days with the many distractions we face. Especially when keeping in shape is not easily obtained. Especially when we are young, this area is the most neglected. We quickly forget that we have one body that is supposed to last us the whole journey on earth, and by the time we wake to care for it, we’ve damaged most parts, and we all know that most parts are easier to maintain than to repair. See, health is another big rock. Its benefit is not immediately apparent if we are young, but it becomes easier to do if we start caring for it early. The compound results can be seen much more evidently and easily later as we age. You will then thank you younger self for having cared for you.

The family and relationships care, such as our relationships with our spouse, children, parents, and other family members, can be cumbersome because we are mostly busy and don’t have time for these things. Covey argues that these relationships are the foundation of our lives, and we need to prioritize them accordingly. Guess what? Relationships take work. It takes nurturing and sacrifices that most of us don’t have much patience for these days. However, if we don’t commit the time to nourish these relationships, we end up empty, lonely, and depressed when we push people away. On the other hand, when we commit, we later appreciate the support of people around us when we need it the most.

Last but not least, Covey addressed professional and financial success, including our career, financial stability, and contribution to society. Covey argues that we need to focus on these areas to achieve meaningful success in our lives. Professional development means that we have to educate ourselves by going through years of school, which is not easy. In addition, higher education is expensive, mainly in the USA. Financial success is even more difficult since most don’t learn economy or finances until later in life. Each time, we associate these two subjects with algebra, one of the most overestimated materials taught in school. No wonder most don’t even want to start learning anything about it and prefer to ignore it until it is forced on us. However, when we push through and become experts in areas that matter to us, educate ourselves, and focus on improving our finances, we empower ourselves and become free.

Covey’s concept of “Big Rocks” is a powerful one because it reminds us to focus on what’s most important in our lives, such as our integrity,

health, relationships, and professional success so that we can achieve true happiness and fulfillment.

However, based on my experience, I understood that the big rocks are so easily overlooked or ignored because they seem so unattainable, so hard and painful, or require way more work than we are willing to put in. So anytime there is something that is important to me and that I know that I need to get to my next level in life, I divide it into smaller pieces, so it is more manageable and doesn’t look so hard anymore.